Dateline Iowa: Republican Party Hoisted on its Own Petard

Written by Tim Arnold. Posted in Opinion, Politics

Published on August 16, 2011 with 1 Comment

By Tim Arnold

August 16, 2011

Let me see if I’ve got this … right:

Michelle Bachmann, who’s beholden to evangelical Christians and whose beliefs stem from the dogma of Francis Schaeffer, who argued in his film series (“How Should We Live Then?”) that “Christians, and Christians alone are Biblically mandated to occupy all secular institutions until Christ returns” (and claims the US government controls all us citizens thru psychotropic drugs), whose husband runs a clinic based on “curing homosexuality thru prayer,” (because gays, as she says, are “part of Satan”) and whose position on our nation’s economy would doom the US to bankruptcy (even S&P had to correct her assessment of their credit downgrading), all the while she continues to benefit from government farm subsidies, triumphs in the Iowa straw poll over …

Ron Paul (barely) –  Paul landed less than a single percentage point behind Bachmann (although you wouldn’t know it from the conservative media’s instant anointment of Bachmann, Romney and Perry as the party’s “Top Tier Candidates”).  A perhaps surprising showing in this conservative state since many of his libertarian positions are, well, provocative: legalize marijuana; abolish income tax; allow Iran to have nukes (“everybody else does…”); pull the US out of the United Nations and NATO – and the Middle East; allow states to secede from the union; eliminate the Federal Reserve; eliminate legal tender laws and sales tax on gold and silver – heck, let the free market determine monetary standards.  Dr No has voted against virtually every initiative for government spending and new taxes in his 14 years as a Texas Congressman – more no’s than any other office holder.  All of which impressed Iowans enough to rank him the second most-desirable Republican candidate.  The American People – in Iowa – have spoken!  But who’s listening?

Willard Mitt Romney – who “didn’t participate” in the Ames Straw Poll, lest he have to explain his successful universal health care program for his home state (note: you can run – but you can’t hide), who showed up anyway and said, “hey, corporations are people, too, my friend,” which is no surprise coming from him, given the millions major corporations have donated to his campaign, knowing he’ll continue to support non-taxation of same. This includes Bain Capital, his former private equity firm, who has anonymously donated $1 million to his campaign. His resume now features his 20 years in the corporate world as more relevant than his minimal 4 years in political office.

Tim “TPaw” Pawlenty – who once had the courage to stand up to W and Karl Rove over their attack of Iraq, and who has offered himself as a potential leader of the free world, picks up his toys and stomps out of the very first competition because he finishes a dismal 3rd.  And, like the rest of his fellow running mates, cowers to the Tea Baggers – whose financial platform will continue to cripple this nation, given Washington’s refusal to stand up to these Nazi’s.

Newt Gingrich – who, during his first week as a presidential candidate labeled fellow Republican Paul Ryan’s budget proposal “right-wing social engineering,” causing most of his fund raisers to flee, followed by all of his staff leadership soon after, and whose third wife obligated him to as much as $500 thousand debt at Tiffany’s – and who’s also willing to eviscerate Medicare, Medicaid and Social Security and continue W’s tax cuts on the wealthy.  All of which illustrates his arrogant hypocrisy.

Rick Santorum – who’s slathering for extreme right-wing voter support exceeds even his competitors’, and leads him to equate gay marriage with incest, akin to “a father marrying his daughter.”  Which is not only irrelevant but, as further evidenced by every single last one of his Republican running mates’ platforms and in addition to its pathological ignorance, has absolutely nothing to do with the genuine problems this nation is facing today.

Herman Cain – who cares?

And then there’s Rick Perry, who proudly proclaims his father-in-law performed his vasectomy as a campaign point, who has totally confused separation of church and state with his keynote at the Texas Christian Prayer Rally – having already extended official state support to the Islamic community through his personal and official relationship with “His Highness” Prince Shah Karim Al Husseini, the Aga Khan IV, and the spiritual leader of the Shiite sect of Nizari Ismaili Muslims, whose 18 million strong believe he is a direct descendant of Muhammad. Perry, who’s been described as W2, who said Texas should maybe secede from the United States of America, whose coffers are over stuffed with millions of corporate dollars, who’s spent hundreds of thousands of dollars of tax payer’s money on vacations and foreign “trade missions,” whose state ranks at the very bottom in public education and whose claims about Texas’ financial strengths are a myth, who argues that the US has no constitutional right to mandate income tax and whose hypocritical madness could actually boost him beyond Bachmann as the Republican Tea Party candidate for US president. Yeah, Perry’s got balls. Which only proves it takes a hell of a lot more than that to qualify for President.

Sarah Palin showed up in Iowa, too.  When asked if the president was to blame for the nation’s credit downgrading, she said “… yes.  Because from the top, leadership starts from the top, the leadership of our country.”

Spoken like the true genius she is, another passenger on the Ship of Fools that is the Republican Tea Bagger party.

The Republican Party continues to demonstrate its utter lack of ideas, its sense of reality and its inability to accomplish anything constructive.  Drowning in its fear of the Tea Party, it is polluted with rabid political bias, consumed by a Nazi-like rage and driven by its single-minded myopia to get rid of Obama at any and all costs – all of which is tantamount to hoisting itself on its own petard, doomed to failure and guaranteed to extend the Democrats’ hold on the White House.

Have a nice day.

Editor’s Note: Views expressed by columnists published on FogCityJournal.com are not necessarily the views or beliefs of Fog City Journal. FCJ supports free speech in all its varied forms and provides a forum for a complete spectrum of viewpoints.

Tim Arnold

Tim Arnold is a 35-year advertising industry veteran and a frequently published writer who's run his own consultancy agency, Possible20, for many years. His first job was at D’Arcy, St. Louis, where he ran the Budweiser business for 10 years, launching the ground-breaking “This Bud’s for You” campaign. He moved to New York twenty-eight years ago, and has run businesses for J. Walter Thompson (Burger King, Miller), Scali McCabe Sloves (Hertz) and DMB&B (worldwide Board of Directors; Dir, Global Business Development). He was president of McCann Amsteryard and a partner at The Ad Store, where he produced the notorious first Super Bowl commercial for GoDaddy. For three years he told his stories in a regular column for Adweek magazine and now contributes to AdvertisingAge. The St. Louis Post-Dispatch has published Tim's work, and he's a frequent contributor to The FogCity Journal. He also plays a mean blues guitar and has played numerous clubs in New York City as part of the Night Train Blues Band.

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  1. At this rate, Obama may be a shoo-in as the lesser of two evils come the general election.