With h brown
SOS - Court Jester needs a computer
November 16, 2006
"You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind
Every electronic device in my room is dead or mortally wounded.
Is there a message here? My computer died Tuesday and I'll trade
a paint job for a replacement.
The old machine is an E-Machine? I don't know anything about
this stuff or maybe I would have heard the dear thing cough or
something and taken preventative measures. Luke Thomas (who has
20 years experience in the field) came over and looked at my broken
computer, sitting next to my broken telephone which is just across
from my broken TV, upon which sets my sketchy radio/dvd player.
He replaced the power supply with absolutely no effect. "I
haven't seen anything like it in all of my life."
That's what Luke said. I get those kinds of comments more than
I'd like. Sometimes it's best to pack up like an Indian and get
the hell out of the encampment. That's not proving to be so easy
I'd planned to have my social security retirement benefits primed
and flowing by the time this election was over and be ready to
take the meager (yet mobile) funds and go find a cabin somewhere.
But the people at social security turned down a copy of my birth
certificate, my passport, drivers license, social security card
and another half dozen forms of ID.
The military refuses to release a copy of my discharge papers.
My home state says my birth certificate is no good because it
doesn't have a first name and they won't release it.
Is there a message here?
Gotta do better than that
So, my identity is being erased by the government, my communications
links to the outside world are nearly all cut, and I'm getting
older every single day without fail. If I weren't normally such
a naturally upbeat, party kind of guy, I might be more concerned.
No problem. I'll put out a call for a used computer or a few
parts and file stories from the places I usually house-sit. Today's
piece is from Anya and Robert's.
Then, Supervisor Daly said he thought my fight to rescue my
identity from social security and the military would make a good
story for me to write. But, is it interesting? My personal stuff
seldom sounds like it would be interesting to anyone other than
me. To me, anyway. I mean, do you want to see a picture of my
birth certificate on which I'm listed as 'Baby Boy Brown, or a
scan of my passport where I look like an East German security
agent, or the letters from social security saying that they don't
believe I'm as old as I say I am?
Damn! Think about that. Most people would be flattered to have
someone doubt their antiquity. Let's just take that story slowly.
Maybe the message is that I'm supposed to stay in town, to cover
things like the rip-off the St. Francis Yacht Club pulled on the
City this afternoon with Peskin, Daly and Dufty nodding their
heads up and down like bobble-headed dogs on a red-neck's dashboard.
St. Francis Yacht Club
Fine food and drink.
Yeah, this place is on public land. Some say it's the most valuable
piece of public land on the face of the planet. Oh, you can't
go in there. That's part of their lease. You see, the City makes
the Golden Gate Yacht Club and all of the other clubs that occupy
public land along the beach to allow the public
the St. Francis Yacht Club. That's amazing.
A couple of years ago when District 11's Gerardo Sandoval had
a tiff with, then supe, Gavin Newsom over special privileges for
the club, Gerardo went down to check it out. And, they wouldn't
let him in! I shit you not. They said their lease allowed them
to discriminate and they were choosing to discriminate against
Gerardo, a sitting City supervisor.
And, they got by with it. Nobody mentioned the Sandoval insult.
No one seemed particularly upset that Park and Rec was asking
for less than a third the rent paid by downtown office lessees.
No one batted an eye when citizens called for the same access
to the club required by other waterfront lessees.
No one (particularly Peskin, whose legacy will include this)
no one mentioned the fact that the City is getting ready
to build a big breakwater outside the entrance to the harbor to
accommodate the club's larger yachts while cutting out most of
the smaller sailboats.
No one mentioned the coastal engineers who came up when the breakwater
the coastal engineers who said that the new
breakwater could collapse the Marina sea wall. Why does Park and
Rec keep giving control of the City's Crown Jewels to the rich?
I can't complain
Really. At least my computer waited until after the election
to turn toes up. And, the screw job on my social security will
pass. They say it always takes at least 6 months and a lawyer
to get your benefits. Hell, I might not leave after all.
That will show them.
h. brown is a 62 year-old keeper of sfbulldog.com,
an eclectic site featuring a half dozen City Hall denizens. h
is a former sailor, firefighter, teacher, nightclub owner, and
a hard-living satirical muckraker. Email
h at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Editor's Note: Views expressed by columnists
published on FogCityJournal.com are not necessarily the views or beliefs of
Fog City Journal. Fog City Journal supports free speech in all its varied forms
and provides a forum for a complete spectrum of viewpoints.