The CrackBerry Chronicles

With Elaine Santore

Photo(s) by Luke Thomas

By Elaine Santore

July 20, 2007

Correction

After reading Monday's column, Mayor's Office of Community Programs Liaison, Ahsha Safai, called to correct my statement that he was pictured, "…shoveling debris whilst wearing a pair of shiny Italian shoes, and while holding a cell phone to his ear."

According to Safai, he is actually wearing a pair of work boots in the photo. And guess whom Safai's speaking to on the phone? Fog City Journal editor/publisher/resident Svengali, Luke Thomas.

Buffy vs. Daly

Seriously, what was C.W. Nevius doing at Tuesday's Board of Supervisor's meeting?

Hey, I don't attend that many BOS meetings, either. I just show up to get the latest gossip, or at least catch up with my friends via GChat and/or BlackBerry Messenger while I wait for something interesting to happen. (Apparently, I'm not alone on that one - what it do, MAP?)

Supervisor Chris Daly says Nevius "should've stuck to sports," and I agree. Nevius' column opens with a typical sports dude cliché: "No man is an island. But Chris Daly is getting close." To be fair, Daly used two notable clichés during Tuesday's meeting. He actually quoted two movie titles in one sentence: "…we must stand and deliver, and do the right thing."

Most of the City's heard about Supervisor Bevan Dufty's now-infamous quote: "Why don't you punch me in the face? If that's what you want to do, go ahead."

h. Brown thinks Buffy's invitation qualifies as sexual harassment because it's a clear indication that he's into S&M, and is wooing Daly into a little foreplay.

Anybody second h.'s theory? Anybody? Bueller?

Does Buff like it rough?

Buffy went on to accuse Daly of helping Mayor Gavin Newsom get re-elected. When asked for comment, Daly said, "I told him 'you don't get to lecture me politically because, basically, who the fuck are you?'"

Personally, I'm disappointed the almost-smackdown between Daly and Supervisor Sean Elsbernd didn't get as much ink. Daly straight up accused Elsbernd and Co. of preferring to "hide underneath their desks" instead of challenging Mayor Gavin Newsom's budget. Elsbernd immediately stood up in protest, and homeboy was thisclose to cutting Daly off before restraining himself.

Supervisors Chris Daly and Sean Elsbernd.

Daly and Elsbernd are on opposite sides of the aisle, but maintain a high level of respect for each other. They are close in age, and possess far more intelligence than most members of the Board. Daly's even said that he has more common ground with Elsbernd than he does with Supervisor Ross Mirkarimi. It's no secret that Daly and Mirkarimi haven't been cool for some time now.

Don't worry; Luke Thomas and a high-profile FCJ City Hall operative are working on it as we speak.

CrackBerry Blind Item

Which sinking ship daily newspaper, who has trouble keeping their facts straight and makes them up as it suits them, has confirmed cocaine sources, but continues to harp on Daly at the mere mention of "alleged cocaine use?"

Pot. Kettle. Black.

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